The Walking Dead: Season 3, Episode 3 – Walk With Me

Don’t get me wrong, I love Michonne’s zombie donkeys. Zonkeys? But what’s her top speed with them in tow? It’s gotta max out at zombie amble, which seems to be 4-5 miles per hour. Maybe she entices them to walk faster, somehow. Does she dangle brains on a stick? Oh…Zonkeys, we hardly knew ye (as was the case in the graphic novels). More questions for The Walking Dead after the break!

Wait, so the Governor’s team didn’t actually see the Zonkeys, just heard them? Even though they’re using high-powered rifles with scopes… Then they hear two noises that I can’t imagine would be silent: 1) a knife cutting through two spinal columns followed by 2) bodies dropping to the ground. Then the crew walks away. Because. Yes? I realize Merle (by the way, Merle’s back!) then abducts them, but still.

This’ll develop into a larger question later I think, but for now I’d just like to point out some major differences between the show and the graphic novels. Michonne does indeed get picked up by the Governor and his crew, and it is a crashed helicopter that first brings them together, but Andrea doesn’t join her. Instead, Glenn and, crucially, Rick do. They saw the helicopter from the jail and ventured out to find it, eventually getting captured. Merle [being a character invented for the show] obviously wasn’t part of the original story, but it seems he’s replaced a similar character from Woodbury, so I’m OK with that.

OK, one initial question about Woodbury: Why, after a spectacular start to an episode (i.e., lots of gore), is everything presented about this eerily perfect community so incredibly boring? 

Why is no one talking about developing a cure? Just in general. Would that not be among your first questions when you meet an outsider who has survived this long. “Oh wow! Other people! Here, come in, come in. Can we get you something? Do you have bullets and/or medicine? Oh, and have you heard anything about a cure? Just wondering.” Even if a place like Woodbury’s idealic setting could safely exist (SPOILER: It doesn’t), once people die they’d of course reanimate, so is there systematic culling of old and sick people? Let’s see this in webisodes please.

Under what circumstances would you find yourself shirtless in the middle of the day during a zombie apocalypse? Ha just kidding. All the time! Fuck skin cancer. But more seriously, would not a single one of the dozen or so TRAINED soldiers get out ONE SHOT on the Governor’s crew?

Can we talk about Michonne’s facial expressions? I mean seriously. She is throwing serious shade this entire episode.

Though Andrea and Michonne rightfully have a reason to suspect not everything about Woodbury is what it seems, they are taken in and cared for. Hell, Andrea was even deathly ill, and they brought her back. Yet not once do we hear either of the two asking what they could do for their saviors. Do they just expect to live here, sapping resources, until whenever? There was totally a dude growing vegetables in the town square. Maybe ask if someone’s house needs to be cleaned?


2 thoughts on “The Walking Dead: Season 3, Episode 3 – Walk With Me

  1. Anonymous says:

    Omg totally called it.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Throw some shade. Spoiler. Michonne is Rupaulcalypse realness.

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