Don’t get me wrong, I love Michonne’s zombie donkeys. Zonkeys? But what’s her top speed with them in tow? It’s gotta max out at zombie amble, which seems to be 4-5 miles per hour. Maybe she entices them to walk faster, somehow. Does she dangle brains on a stick? Oh…Zonkeys, we hardly knew ye (as was the case in the graphic novels). More questions for The Walking Dead after the break!
Wait, so the Governor’s team didn’t actually see the Zonkeys, just heard them? Even though they’re using high-powered rifles with scopes… Then they hear two noises that I can’t imagine would be silent: 1) a knife cutting through two spinal columns followed by 2) bodies dropping to the ground. Then the crew walks away. Because. Yes? I realize Merle (by the way, Merle’s back!) then abducts them, but still.
OK, one initial question about Woodbury: Why, after a spectacular start to an episode (i.e., lots of gore), is everything presented about this eerily perfect community so incredibly boring?
Why is no one talking about developing a cure? Just in general. Would that not be among your first questions when you meet an outsider who has survived this long. “Oh wow! Other people! Here, come in, come in. Can we get you something? Do you have bullets and/or medicine? Oh, and have you heard anything about a cure? Just wondering.” Even if a place like Woodbury’s idealic setting could safely exist (SPOILER: It doesn’t), once people die they’d of course reanimate, so is there systematic culling of old and sick people? Let’s see this in webisodes please.
Under what circumstances would you find yourself shirtless in the middle of the day during a zombie apocalypse? Ha just kidding. All the time! Fuck skin cancer. But more seriously, would not a single one of the dozen or so TRAINED soldiers get out ONE SHOT on the Governor’s crew?
Though Andrea and Michonne rightfully have a reason to suspect not everything about Woodbury is what it seems, they are taken in and cared for. Hell, Andrea was even deathly ill, and they brought her back. Yet not once do we hear either of the two asking what they could do for their saviors. Do they just expect to live here, sapping resources, until whenever? There was totally a dude growing vegetables in the town square. Maybe ask if someone’s house needs to be cleaned?