This was an episode without many major dramatic moments, but I feel like it had loads of tiny subtle moments. Well, as subtle as you can expect from a show about men dressing as women. The laughs really built up, until you didn’t realize you were laughing the whole time.
It’s the annual makeover episode, and not a minute too soon. Of course, on a show already full of heavy makeup, wigs, and dresses, the makeover episode requires the girls to makeover random straight guys. In this case they are all fathers, I think strictly so that they can be referred to coyly as “daddies” all throughout. The trick is you don’t pick the hottest guy, because he probably won’t transform as easily. You want the ones who are already sort of ambiguous looking. But there’s a twist! The DILFs (“dads I’d like to frock”) have to be sporting “baby bump realness.” My only complaint is that this should be a much earlier challenge because it relies so heavily on the strangers. It’s not a challenge that indicates the strengths of the girls so so well. Still, it’s all about transformation, and that’s sort of the point of all of this.
On to the Drag-o-Meter!
- The mini-challenges are getting simpler and lamer, aren’t they? Now they seem to just decorate crap each week.
- Sharon’s DILF Mike is kind of a jerk. She/he later tries to make up with Chad, but I think it was only to save face on camera.
- For once I’m going to call out Michelle’s outfit, which was horrible. What the fuck were those shoulders? She jokes that she’s matching Ru, but dare I say Ru was more demure?
- I wish the strip tease segment weren’t edited so swiftly. I could barely catch moments. Why was it even its own thing?
- Hmm, there aren’t any drinks, Absolut or otherwise, in the Interior Illusions Lounge. Was it because the producers didn’t want to present [men dressed as] pregnant women boozing it up? Was it Logo who decided that? No, it must have been Absolut.
- Obviously, we have to have a segment devoted entirely to the DILFs learning how to tuck their junk. Ouch.
- Oh wow, Kenya’s DILF’s face was…gosh, I dunno…sad? Confused? Sick? He’s the absolute worst in the face. Michelle asks him if it were an unwanted pregnancy, and he replies he’s “ready to have this baby.”
- Jennifer Love Hewitt sheds exactly one tear when the loser leaves the stage.
- DiDa left the remaining 4 girls cheesecake, which is apparently some kind of inside joke. I wanna know!
- Chad’s DILF provides way too much direction, which is hilarious since she’s obviously the most experienced of possibly everyone in the history of the show.
- I have no proof to this, but I wonder how much the producers play up the macho aspects of the DILFs, specifically the abundance of facial hair and muscle shirts.
- Phi Phi asks her DILF whether he would care if his daughter or theoretical son were gay. Naturally, he responds approvingly. Then we have a scene where Chad’s DILF muses whether two gay men or women joining in a union should be called “marriage.” Chad provides a tangible example wherein he would perhaps be denied the right to visit his partner in a hospital if they weren’t legally married. Though I still think these educational moments are too short and too infrequent, they do pop up in every episode. I wonder what the demographics for this show are. Like, do any straight men watch this show? Perhaps for the sheer theatricality of it? There are definitely people who love musicals without realizing they are made by, comprised almost entirely of, and enjoyed mostly by gay men. Could this show fit somewhere in there, and if so do these short educational moments convey anything?
- Oh wow, the Royale family in their maternity gowns. I’m speechless.
- Jessie wonders whether Latrice and her DILF had a different baby daddy.
- In a unique non-Untucked moment, we get to see the DILFs’ reactions backstage as their respective contestants win or lose on the runway in front of the judges. I would have liked more, but that’s what Untucked is for, after all.
- After hearing they’d be rejoined by a 5th, presumably less worth contestant from the past, the remaining girls make protest signs reading “Top 4 Add No Mo’.”
- Yay, Kenya Michaels is back! Obviously, I wanted to see Willam return, but I didn’t imagine someone who broke the rules would be allowed back. Kenya was my second choice. She’s adorbs.
- Ru’s “when I was growing up” creaky old lady voice.
- Sharon’s DILF, Michael, starts off by playing with his fake boobs and pointing out Sharon’s bulge. I have no idea what’s going on. He has no filter. Maybe it’s the grandfather thing. Like, he’s gone all the way past home base and just kept going. I want to be like that when I’m in my 60’s.
- This season’s seen no shortage of actual celebrity guest judges, and today’s no exception. We’re joined by Jessie Tyler Ferguson and Jennifer Love Hewitt. These are people who are currently working on television, and not on Celebrity Apprentice.
- Chad’s way of connecting with his DILF is to have him recall experiences at a strip club, presumably on the other side of the pole.
- Jessie points out that Chad and her DILF must have a “very long child” since their baby bumps are more like baby loaves.
- So Sharon’s DILF Michael obviously looks nothing like a woman, but it works for me.
- Phi Phi’s DILF wins the “most womanly” award for sure. Maybe it’s the realistic makeup or the simple but sexy dresses? Good job, girl. Less crying next time, though.
- Chad’s “Malibu Bear-bie” is described as very Jiggly Caliente, and we’re treated to a quick cut to Jiggly’s first episode runway look. Touche.
- Sharon and her DILF fake morning sickness at the end of the runway. A nice touch.
- Ru asks the DILFs if they tucked, and when one responds positively, the judges all clap.
- Kenya glued his DILF’s shoes to her feet!
- I just got Sharon Needles’ DILF’s name, Robyn Mansions. Heart.
- Could there be a more disparate lip sync for your life? On the one hand we have the energetic ballerina moves of Kenya Michaels, and on the other we have an extremely reserved by emotive Latrice Royale. Since it’s “You Make Me Feel (like a Natural Woman),” Latrice has the more appropriate rendition. I think she made the smarter choice, and she’s safe, obviously. Goodbye Kenya…again.
- Oh boy, where to start with Untucked… We have discussion of shaving body hair, wearing panty hoes, tucking, makeup and so on. When the fight between Mike and Chad is brought up, Sharon explains that it’s different when drag queens do it, and it’s another thing entirely when an outsider calls one “bitch.” Mike claims he thought everyone was just joking around, and no one was really offended. I think what I enjoy most is how the DILFs revert to calling the contestants “girls” and “queens” after spending all of like 2 days with them. They go on to explain to each other that they’ve realized it’s OK to perform as a woman yet retain a self-identified sense of masculinity too.
- The Pink Box surprise this week is pickles and ice cream.
It was a light week for quotes, but there were keepers. Sharon was noticeably quieter for whatever reason.
- “Nice try Norma Ray.” -Ru
- “Sexy pregnant MILF realness.” -Phi Phi
- “It’s a boy, it’s a girl, it’s both.” -Ru
- “We’re serving Carnival pregnant realness.” -Chad
- “My other eye is a good judgement eye” -Jessie
- “Nothing makes a woman feel prettier than standing next to this one over here.” “Well that’s why I hang out with Michelle Visage.” -Sharon and Ru
- “Sharrell is a ho. She can’t even get enough of herself in the mirror.” -Latrice
Team As the Day is Long did as well as could be expected this week. I’m not unhappy with 24 points. Still, Latrice is not pulling her weight — pun intended — so she gotsa go. The new lineup is below. Chad’s back with a vageance. Will they be in the top three?