Project Runway All Stars: Episode 8

This was an oddly noncommercial challenge — especially for Project Runway All Stars standards — unless…the United Nations needs publicity? There were some fun moments with Not-Tim-Gunn, like when she wears an outfit that perfectly matches the Jamaican flag, but ironically she waltz up to it and doesn’t recognize its country of origin. If a contestant did that they’d be scolded. It was interesting when she pointed out how most of the men’s designs required their models omit bras. “Woman want to wear underwear,” she scolds them! DM thinks otherwise: “I have to comment on Joanna’s obsession with undergarments this week. I love backless clothing. All a designer needs to do to solve the bra problem is sew cups into the boob area. Not all women are so bra obsessed.”

Thank goodness Austin cut off the ‘stache! At some point in the future, according to the confessionals. Only 6 left to critique!

Jerell

DM: Loves it. I could do with a little less of the green draping, but I LOVED the dress when I saw a shot of it on the model before the draping was added, and I actually think the draping enhances it. It’s supposed to represent India for goodness sake!

MJ: Loves it…with a BUT. The green thing and all of the accessories have to go. When you’re left with the sheer/bedazzled India-inspired…thing, it’s really kinda cool. OK, so pretty impractical, but it’s really unique and somehow doesn’t come off slutty to me. With the green thing I only barely like it.

Kenley

DM: Loves it. But I don’t understand it. I love the dress but what does it have to do with Chile or its flag? And seriously, Kenley, step out of  your box!

MJ: Loves it. She absolutely does use this same top over and over again, but she does it well, and more importantly its always worn well by the model. Once again I love the prints, and it’s happened too many times for us to not admit she is an expert with pattern. Overall it’s simple but unfamiliar too me. Oh, this is supposed to be a country? Gosh, I have no idea. Saturn? I will admit I’m probably swayed by Kenley’s oddly charming narcissism and thus keep giving her passes. She does sort of make the same silhouette over and over again, but is that breaking any rules? The judges have already seen all of these people before [and know what they’re capable of], so what’s the harm in them sticking to one thing and iterating it really well week after week? Isn’t that what other designers often do?

Austin

DM: Hates it. She’s a fairy from Midsummer Night’s Dream. And not in a good way.

MJ: Dislikes it. Dare I say, it’s a little sloppy? I actually don’t mind the yellow and blue, although the makeup is bizarre. Admittedly, I know nothing about Seychelles other than that it is marginally close to Sao Tome and Principe according to my 7th grade world history rhyming mnemonic device. I also don’t like how the two colors uncomfortably meld at the spindly shoulder straps. At the end of the runway, it’s pretty boring.

Mondo

DM: Loves it. Perfection.

MJ: Loves it. Wow. Just, wow. I have no idea — besides the head wrap — what this could possibly have anything to do with Jamaica, but fuck if I care. How did he manage to fit this onto his model so well? It’s both demure yet sexy. There’s maybe too much covered, but the body-hugging fit accentuates what you can’t see in just the right ways. Lastly, it’s impressive he went with such an atypical monochromatic look (black jumpsuit). Then boom! Green and yellow chevrons bringing up the rear.

Mila

DM: Loves/Hates it. I can’t stop looking at it and I have very strong if not fully defined feelings about it. First off, it has nothing to do with Papua New Guinea. If I saw this and had to guess what country it represented I would have guessed Red China. It’s ugly, but it’s so stark and ugly that I actually like it…for someone else.

MJ: Lates it. Seriously, I’m torn. If I blur my vision and unthink that it is two different dresses sewn together, Two-Face style, then I kind of like it. If I, however, perceive the two halves as what they are (two halves) then I’m unimpressed. What does this have to do with her country? Is her country North Korea? It’s austere, but again I’m not sure whether that’s good or bad. It looks uncomfortable; like, in what weather would this be appropriate? It’s like someone who sleeps with their feet sticking out under the sheets.

Michael

DM: Hates it. People should not wear bows unless they are a toddler! And as far as the back…say no to crack! I also have to say that as a former pageant girl, I am greatly offended that the judges would refer to this as a pageant dress. It’s far too heinous to ever grace a pageant stage.

MJ: Hates it. Ugh, what the fuck is that blue ribbon doing on her shoulder? I have to give the producers credit, because all during the workroom they showed us parts of this dress that really could have been beautiful. Little did we know that Michael would slap on a giant blue horse first prize. I’m not so upset about the back as I am just about the neckline in general. To me, it’s fancy pajamas. Bananas in pajamas, if you will. No wait, pomegranates in pajamas. Nailed it. How is Michael still on this show, really? He wasn’t one of the great designers from his season. He absolutely doesn’t care that he chose a design and style that he was familiar with. Um, we don’t care that you’re Greek.

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