After a nice Christmas break, Once Upon A Time decided to kick things up a notch. The most interesting character on the show, Rumpelstiltskin, has appeared in the back and present stories of all the other interesting Storybrooke developments. How appropriate that now we learn a little something about him in the new year.
Remember how the hot Sheriff Graham was murdered by the Evil Queen because he began remembering who he was? Well, now the Evil Queen/Mayor needs to find a new Sheriff, and in true 2012 fashion, it should be an election. Hazaah!! Heroine Deputy Emma Stone cannot win this election by herself, so Mr.Gold (the present day version of Rumpelstiltskin) offers his help. So it begins, a battle between the two puppet candidates–controlled by their evil masters. K, I may be overselling this a bit. But there is some smear campaigning and some arson, and we get to see that adorable Prince Charming again. Thankfully, the whole crazy town, Riding Hood and all, come out of the woodwork.
Mirroring this election, we have the background of Rumpley. We finally get to figure out how he got such bed teeth. Turns out, he was not always a black mage. Nope, he was a poor sheep-shearing father who did not want his son to be drafted in the Ogre Wars (side note: I want to know much more about this Ogre War thing). Turns out, after a convoluted story about a dagger, Rumpley found a way to steal magic from some other dark lord of mayhem.
Oh, but how magic changes people. In both realities, Rumpley turns out to be kind of a douche. He makes a point of manipulating the election of people of Storybrooke and kind of murdering people in the past. Just when you think he has shown a bit of heart, he gets evil again.
There are some basic good/bad guidelines that the show sticks to with fervor. It is kind of like if a movie criticism class at a party school (like Ole Miss) was discussing color as a representation of emotion. That Professor (who would only have a MFA from Phoenix Online) would choose this show as an example of good = white and bad = black. In fact, Google search Snow White Once Upon A Time and you will see that in every still taken from the show where she is in character, she is wearing white. Yes, yes, I get that her name is also Snow White, but that was in reference to her skin, not her clothing. Do the same with the Evil Queen. No, really. Go do it, I’ll wait.
Now that we have covered that, I again must confess that I kind of like this show. Kind of. Remember when The Da Vinci Code came out and everyone was reading it? And you started to read it and no matter how tired you were you kept reading? The book was not written very well, but there were elements about it, the mystery, the discovery, the fantasy and magic of it all made a reader power through until the end. This show is like a shittier version of The Da Vinci Code, or, I guess, you could say–This show is like the movie version of The Da Vinci Code. So, here I am, it is getting late and I kind of want to get on to the next chapter/episode, not because I really want to, but because I am just hoping the ending will be worth it.