The Drunken Movie Critic: TRON Legacy

Okay, so I should go ahead and come clean that I have not seen the 1st TRON. A reliable source told me that I did not need a working knowledge of plot to enjoy this movie, and thankfully, he was right. For what I expected — a shallow good time, lots of lights and explosions and pretty people to keep me entertained — you nailed it.

If you go in expecting anything more than Hollywood glitz, well, then you lose. Loud motorcycles, weak plot points, fancy costumes…they only get you so far. While the film paid for it’s ticket price with the expected amount of drama-laced action, it was not that great.

Notice how many times I have used the word “expected”? Yeah…any movie that I fell panders to me or I feel I could have written…it is more often than not, garbage. This was pretty, recycled garbage that smelled kind of like Indian food…but it was still garbage.

I must also add that I made the mistake of seeing this movie COMPLETELY SOBER. [Editor’s note: Fire Funny Nurse.]

Olivia Wilde- I barely recognized you, but that says more to the costume designers than it does to you acting talent.

Jeff Bridges- wow, dude, this was Lebowski with Lasers.

Overall Grade- 62%


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