Bread, Gizmodo Gallery, Donut Plant, and Donnybrook

Alli, don’t fail me now!

Eggs Benedict (from Bread), Pancakes (from Gizmodo Gallery), Pistachio Yeast Donut (from Donut Plant), and a Bramble (from Donnybrook)

Funny Nurse and I hit up the eastern, generally southern part of Manhattan this past Sunday to indulge in what else, carbs and alcohol (which is itself usually not in low-carb forms).  Make that carbs, alcohol, and surliness.

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Confused by the conjoined droplets of pancake?  Us too.  They’re courtesy of a Chefstak Automatic Pancake Maker.  I’ll give you a minute to extrapolate its function given that title.  It was on display at this year’s Gizmodo Gallery.  “CHANGE BAG,” the machine cryptically ordered us via its dot-matrix display.  What am I, an IT dude?  Also, what bag?  Tiny machines that make pancakes in under three minutes don’t make them from scratch?  A tree filled with talking elves isn’t hidden inside the glossy metal box?  I vaguely remember telling Funny Nurse to “crank it to the max,” which in pancake making-speak means mashing buttons until something beeps.

Still no pancakes.  I instinctively opened and closed the lid, assuming it wasn’t searing hot (which in retrospect was entirely possible), just as one would a finicky laser printer that thinks it needs new toner.  Sure enough, the conveyor belt started moving, and after about 90 seconds it pooped out what you see here.  I guess it really did need a bag refill.  I offered to split the nickel-sized Siamese twincakes with Funny Nurse, but she declined.

“Sorry, nerdy druggie shut-ins, if I broke your munchie machine.  Your 3D Etch-a-Sketch was heavy and confusing, so I needed nourishment.  It’s basically your fault, in a way.”

We were a little tipsy on Pinot Grigio after all.  Thanks, cheapest thing on the Bread menu.  Donut Plant was bustling with people, per usual.  I took home no less than four donuts: creme brulee, vanilla, pistachio, and blackberry-filled [vanilla].

Alli’s effects multiply with each pill, right?  I’m sure it’s written somewhere on the label, online, and in those colorful booklets they send with the pills, but I can’t be bothered to check on my wild assumptions!  Don’t shatter my universe if you know the truth.

Oh, and booze number two is a Bramble from Donnybrook.  We were so fascinated by a vat of horseradish that the barkeepstress gave us a sample of a Bloody Mary.  I wain’t complaining!


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