I recently had the opportunity to sit down with a writer from the show Glee. Though he wished to remain anonymous, this writer was able to answer some of the serious questions I had about the episode “Big Brother.”
Thanks for taking the time to sit down with me. This episode was the mid-winter season premiere; was there pressure to produce some interesting story lines?
Actually, there was no pressure to create new story lines, and there was even less pressure to continue with the story arcs we had created throughout the season. At the beginning of each writing session, the writers get to shout out their favorite story themes — down syndrome, pregnancy, brothers, wheelchair, Broadway, pool cleaning — then the show gets formed around one. That might explain why there is such inconsistency show-to-show and why some themes get dropped. Do not be surprised if Quinn starts walking next week or synchronized swimming finals creep in sometime later.
Well, word came down from the big man himself (Ryan Murphy) that he wanted some brother drama. The only brothers on the show are Finn and Kurt, and the writers decided that the conflict in that particular relationship was resolved with the episode “Furt,” so we created a new brother in Cooper Anderson. I personally love the show White Collar and think that the actor Matt Bomer is super fine. Bomer also has the internet abuzz because no one knows if he is gay or straight. Well, what better way to take the curiosity out of his sexual orientation then by having him sing and dance on Glee! It works so well because he tests so well with women 13-92 because he is so gorgeous. The gays just love him, and he tests well with most straight men because he is what TV calls a “non-threatening gay”…you know, he is well groomed, but not all faggy.
Oh, God, probably not. Like all our guest actors, he has a fantastic story. In fact, we know more about Cooper Anderson than we do about Principal Figgins. Cooper has had more speaking lines than Tina Cohen-Chang. Cooper has sung more songs on the show than Coach Beiste. So, naturally, he will not be back.
Well, in truth, the relation between made some members uncomfortable. We thought it would be fun to play around with the language and dynamics of various songs that were traditionally about romantic relationships. It turns out that though sibling emotions are just as strong and complex as with any lover…if you don’t choose just the right song, things can sound a little incestuous.
Goodbye, Cooper Anderson.
Sure, I suppose. Because the producers felt it would be inauthentic to be stuck in a Simpsons time loop, we decided to have a graduation of some members of the cast. First, we had to go back through the previous episodes and figure out what grade everyone was in…you know, if there been a previous mention of class or year. Then we looked at the contracts of the actors and found that they all ended after 3 years. So that made a bunch of people sophomores in Season 1. Notice I said “a bunch” because we discussed it, but damned if anyone in the room wrote it down, so every episode we kind of make it up. Notice in this episode ["Big Brother"] we have a Senior Ditch Day — the great American tradition of the most popular kids in school taking off a weekday to drink and get pregnant — and everyone in the Glee Club happens to be there. That was just to cover our asses. We won’t officially know who is truly a senior until the season finale.
Well, we knew going into the season that Ryan Murphy decreed “More Wheelchairs” as a goal for the show. So, everyone in production knew that Quinn was going to get in an accident. During the hiatus, we realized we may have jumped the shark on the car accident thing. After some research watching Grey’s Anatomy and searching WebMD.com, the staff discovered that car crashes can really fuck a person up. Window glass to the face and eyes, internal organs being ruptured because of the seat belt, sternum crushed against the steering column, burns from the hot/exploding air-bag, shattered femur from being crushed by a car…I mean, honestly, the list was horrendous. The pressure was on me to write in an explanation of Quinn’s injuries but kind of gloss over the fact that she does not poop into a bag or has no facial lacerations. Hollywood magic!
Of course! When the whole Glee Club is sitting around taking about Senior Ditch Day, Rachel Berry stands up and says something like “Oh, Quinn, you were only injured because of me, on your way to my wedding that I invited you to on the date and time of my choosing; it is my fault you were injured!” I just love how, though Rachel has few lines this episode, we remind the viewers at home that Rachel is truly a terrible person.
Hmm. I thought you were going to say the acting lessons given by Cooper.
Oh, that was hilarious.
Were you talking to me? I couldn’t tell because you didn’t point.